Wow. I know I haven't posted in quite a while. Ever since the boys got placed with us my blogging has kind of fallen off. By the time they go to bed at night I don't have the energy to post anything. There are so many things I wish I could share about them but we just can't. They are doing very well in preschool and learning lots of new things. They have really improved in letters, colors, numbers, and Cruiser writes his name by himself now! Some days he does better than others but with encouragement and when he's in the mood he writes it really well. Bruiser is day-time potty trained and even at school he does very well. He was wearing regular underwear with potty pants over top in case he did have an accident. After being accident free for a while I took the potty pants off and he's done very well since then!!!! He had a few accidents at school after the potty pants were gone but not many!! I've heard/read other Mom's talk about dreading when its about time to potty train. I'm sure I would have felt the same way if I had a child that was reaching that age. Thankfully, getting placed with a boy that is already at that age I didn't have time to dread getting to that point...he was already at the point of needing to have it done so I didn't have time to stew about it. With my personality I think it was good I didn't have the time to think about it...it was better to just dive right in and get it done. Easier said than done though. He still wears a diaper at night but everybody keeps telling me not to worry about it...that it will come in time. I'm trying to work on not letting it bother me.
As far as discipline goes we have been trying to figure out strategies that will work so they will learn to behave. Time-outs, corner and removal of privileges. I've been trying to talk with others on what works for them and their children. The hard thing is that they are raising bio children. I haven't had these kids since birth so I'm starting out with one very strong willed little boy and one who loves to please but does get moody/ornery. Don't get me wrong they are very good boys. However, they are kids so they do misbehave, challenge us, test our patience, and be ornery.
I've heard of 1-2-3 Magic by a few people and I've actually watched most of the DVD. I have always been skeptical of counting because I think that by counting to 3 or whatever number you may choose the child catches on that once you say 1 they still have at least 1 more chance to misbehave and they turn that into them controlling the situation by stopping the behavior at 2 or right when you say 3. Basically it just feels like your giving them permission to continue on in the behavior. Now I do realize the counting may not work for all situations however the DVD didn't cover some of the problems I have run into. For example, the first few times I did the counting with the boys and they persisted in their behavior they did take a time-out. However, now they think it is a game and when I say 1 they look at me and smile, persist in the behavior and then say that's 2. Man that is so frustrating. Its like they think its a game. But maybe I am doing something wrong...because this certainly isn't magic. I know that their is an age difference in the boys but when they are smiling at me and laughing and just by the look on their faces they know that they are doing something wrong they do need discipline for their actions. I've tried explaining behavior has consequences such as time outs, corner, removal of privileges. Cruiser seems to understand that most of the time. Bruiser still seems a bit puzzled by this and I've tried to break it down as simply as I can but maybe he's just still too young. During the 1-2-3 Magic DVD I watched the guy talk about us parents thinking of the kids as "little adults" he referred to it as "little adult syndrome." I feel myself thinking this many times. Forgetting that they don't have the same reasoning/logic that we do and that if I didn't have those expectations I could understand more of their misbehavior. So anyways, I'm not sure counting is going to work for us. But if any of you reading this do the counting...let me know what you think. Am I doing something wrong?
Our licensing worker came for her semi-annual over a month ago and talked about the discipline strategy called "Love & Logic" so I might start looking into that. I think the agency offers classes on it so I might just sign us up for that!
If any of you reading this have any suggestions/advice let me know.
We love love love these boys and they have taught me a lot! They wear me out but also make me laugh and smile at their craziness!
